The first poem I ever shared….

Thinking about when I read this out lout….When I say I was terrified I mean it… this felt like such an unbelievably vulnerable thing to share. But I have come to realise my writing isn’t just for me… it is meant to be shared. So here here it is, and the button below takes you to the recording of me first reading it in Mallorca.

THE WAY WE BETRAY OURSELVES

By shutting up 

And thinking small 

By doing the things we think look cool 

Abandoning our souls By laughing less and doing more 

Sucking in and saying yes 

Saying less but speaking more 

‘It’s fine it’s fine. 

No problem  at all. 

Please don’t worry about it.’We reassure. 

But I worry. 

I worry that the little girl 

Who danced and laughed and stood so tall

I worry that she’s too far away to come back 

After all the abandoning I’ve done. 

You see i put her in a box I said 

Be less like you and more like her. 

Be less. Be less. Bless. 

You’re so embarrassing and your tummy is fat SUCK IN. 

Boys don’t like that Jess. Be less. 

Tiny betrayals of self that caused a loss greater than any fall

And it’s not just me 

I see a nation of women who forgot what it felt like to be free 

We got the light squeezed out of us by an expectation that wasn’t meant for us. 

But the spark is there. Under all the claims of IM FINE and I don’t care. 

Is a little girl with glitter in her hair who really fucking cares

Silently screaming to be seen and set free. 

And I dream you see. Of a world where these girls run it. 

How glorious it could be. 

But don’t worry about me. 

I’m fine. x 

Thank you for being here. I appreciate you deeply love. x